One of the main themes of the book is the theme of Sin, Repentance, and Forgiveness. The characters in the book are bound by a very strict set of laws that many of them feel are unnecessary. That being said, each of them has their own set of laws that they abide by as well. The same can be said for all of us. We all abide by multiple sets of laws. For students, you may be bound by the law of the country, religious law, your parents rules, as well as your own personal code of conduct.
For example, one of my personal laws is that I try to say hello to strangers as often as possible. Growing up in Northern California, it is something that has always impressed me about people that live here and I want to keep that tradition alive. It is not a law by any means, but when I break it, I feel bad.
That leaves us to forgiveness. The other main problem that plagues the Puritans, and still plagues us today, is that we have no good way for forgiving people. For many, that means that we still hold grudges sometimes for years. You hear people say things like "I forgive, but I don't forget." Outside of the country we see evidence of other cultures that have been in a perpetual war for decades. Fighting over grudges that were started long before any of the fighters now were born.
What set of laws govern you? Where does your personal code of conduct enhance of take away from the laws we are all bound by?
When we commit an error, or when others commit errors against us, how soon do we forgive them or ourselves? Are you the kind of person who forgives easily, or do you hold onto grudges forever?
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concerning my personal sins, a few years ago i have made a goal for myself to never judge someone until i get to know them really well. This is because i know everyone has a past and a reason they are who they are and i could never understand unless i walked a lifetime in there shoes and experienced their every thought.
When it comes to forgiveness, i am an extremely forgiving person sometimes i think maybe too much. I never gold grudges ever. If i get mad at someone who hurt me, no matter how badly, i get really pissed off for a day or maybe only a few hours, but then let it go and forgive them because everyone messes up and i won't be able to move on until i forgive them. I also try my hardest to forgive myself because in my opinion i can't truly forgive someone else for their wrong doings until i forgive my own.
-Heather
im the forgiving kind of person mostly my whole family and friends know from what i have gone trough high school and everyone thinks im to nice and to forgiveaful for forgiving that preson but what i think is that everyone deserves a second chance for what they did no matter whats it is if you feel and are sure that, that person wont do it again and know them so well and have gone trough alot but if time passes and they do it again that was their one and only second chance they get evryone should be forgiven for what they did in the past, the past is the past what i always say is i forgive and forget what happen but it doesnt just happen right away the foriven part does but the forget NO, i NEED TIME it always takes me time for that, most of all, i forgave that person for what they did but i still remember it but i have forgotten most of it and its just the past now. so what i think is that you should be forgiven and always give a second chance and i think yo should keep in mind is to forgive and forget.
Forgiving people sometimes is a hard thing for me to do; however when someone actually tells me the words their sorry and means it, I almost always accept it. If someone can recognize they did something wrong or something that hurt you then it makes it much easier for me to forgive and forget. But if the person keeps arguing that they did nothing wrong it becomes harder for me to move on with the subject as opposed to forgiving them. Sometimes I realize that I'm holding a grudge about something but I can't even remember what it is, these are the times when I realize that I need to forgive the person because obviously it's over something stupid if I can't even remeber it. I also have times when I want to forgive people because I care about them a lot, but I feel like they hurt me so bad that it would almost be dumb to forgive them. For me forgiving someone is a difficult thing to do, although most times it's better to forgive, it still depends on the situation.
My whole life I've been a pretty "good" kid a lot of people would say. To me any personal sins would be breaking certain laws like stealing or doing things where you could hurt other people like drinking and driving. On a more personal level I usually try to make everyone around me feel comftorble. I feel bad if someone feels awkward or out of place especially when they shouldn't, so I usually try to talk to new people.
When it comes down to it i am a forgiving person. I might give the person a hard time if they have forgotten something important, but i am never really mad just giving them a hard time and laughing about it with them later. I do not like to be mad at anyone ever its just a feeling i wish to avoid even if the person has done something incredibly stupid. Also i hate having people be frustrated with me even if i did give them a reason to be i have to fix it. Also, in regard to personal sins, i do have some. Such as, i really try and keep people happy, i try and make them feel better if they are down, if i dont i dont feel that i have done my job. I abide by the rules set out by society for the most part, little things like speeding happens occasionally but i think to myself, " i dont want to piss anyone off, i better slow down". I feel bad when i speed but sometimes it is necessary. Another personal sin to me is putting off work till the last minute. Something else i have to do is treat adults or senior citizens with respect. If i dont do this i fell terrible.
I too like others have a certain code of conduct and certain things that I feel the need to do or else i feel like i have violated my unwritten laws. One is, holding the door open for people. I feel like I am breaking my own peosonal law if violated and I will feel guilty for longer then I probably should. As far as forgiveness goes...when I get mad it, its usually for a good reason. I will say though I don't hold a grudge for too long I tend to forgive farely easily. Sometimes I think a little to fast. But I know that I won't be able to hold a grudge against them for life so there is no point in living my life in anger so I tend to just get over it pretty fast. There is one incident that has happened in my life and i still hold that grudge for a long time if not forever but I have good reason and still do. Everything and incident is different.
carlee
i usually try to forgive people as soon as possible, that is, when the time is right. i does me, nor any other person, any good to be mad at people, so i either make amends to the situation, or just dont associate with that person anymore and forget about it.
one of my personal laws is that i try to be nice and associate with people who dont have very many friends, or people who dont know to many people. i hate being lonely, so it troubles me to see others being lonely.
i try to be a forgiving person. i dont really hold on to grudges, but if i do, it normally only lasts for about a day. im not one who likes to be mad all the time or when i pass someone who has made me mad in the past.
as for personal codes of conduct. i try to be respectful to everyone. i try to say hi to everyone that i walk by but sometimes i get shy and dont say anything to them and after they pass i feel bad and start to regret not saying anything. another thing that i do all the time is opent the door for people. elderly or friends and family. it really bugs me if i dont do it.
my personal sin, i always try to say bless you after someone sneezes only bc most people forget to. just the simple things i like to do for people, open doors, ask how their day is going.
forgiveness, forgiveness is a big thing in my life. i believe in it so much. forget and forgive. people make mistakes we arent perfect. i try to forgive everyone that has hurt me but sometimes its rly hard.
my personal sin, i always try to say bless you after someone sneezes only bc most people forget to. just the simple things i like to do for people, open doors, ask how their day is going.
forgiveness, forgiveness is a big thing in my life. i believe in it so much. forget and forgive. people make mistakes we arent perfect. i try to forgive everyone that has hurt me but sometimes its rly hard.
I dont have a set of "laws" necisarally that govern me. Im only human and i kind of take things day by day. Honestly, every day for me can be different, it depends on what mood im in unfortunately, because that is not always a good thing. I am a huge believer in respect, I think that if someone doesnt like another person, they shouldent worry about what they are doing, they shouldent waste their time talking about them. Do i hold grudges? well it really depends on the situation. If someone killed or hurt or talked bad about one of my family members or a real good friend of mine, i wouldent approach the situation being completely ignorant BUT my family and some of my friends definately come first so i could easily hold a grudge if someone hurt them.
I could honestly care less if someone was talking about me. i dont hold grudges against people who dont like me or talk bad about me.They have every right to feel the way they do whether they have a good reason or not. And nobody has ever physically threatend me or anything like that so i dont know if i would hold a grudge in that situation. We will see!!
becca davis
When it comes to personal sin i think i may have to many but they all seem very little to me. First i cannot hang up on anyone no matter what may happen. I have to be fair to everyone and everything, no matter who they may be... Often through out my life i tend to make the people around me happy other then thinking about myself then i tend to get upset and " explode" at a certain point. When it comes to forgiveness i easily forgive people that do dont play a major role in my life... but when it comes to people who do play a major role in my life i find it harder to forgive but if you are willing to give me time i will forgive and quickly forget.
My personal sin have to do with my past. i moved school and did not have friends. So if i see someone sittin alone at school i always try to say hello or even invite them into our group. i have started to drift away from this and iam very dissapointed in my self. if i dont talk to that person it eats me up all day. i fell so guilty.
one of my personal laws is to try and be nice to everyone. The hard part is finding the balance between being nice,and being funny. when i look at my day i try to think of who i was mean to, and i try to figure out why i was mean to them.
I think forgiving myself is the hardest part, but usually i try to be nice to the person the next day, and that usually helps me feel better.
Am a person that can forgive someone but it dose take awhile for me to be able to trust that person again. people do need a a second chance.everyone in the word dose mess up and learns from what they do wrong. if you just forgive it can still be a great friendship,but make sure that they mean what they say is true. dont forget to give someone a second chance
-Raquel
I believe that people should have some way to forgive themselves when they commit a sin, however it is their choice to actually forgive themselves. Most people have a method of repentance but rarely or never use it. I myself have some sins I have committed and have repented myself, but there are always sins that can never be forgiven and I truly wish I have never committed them. I today still commit sins that I wish I've never done, it's a part of life. But forgiving the sins of others is in turn, even harder to do because you don't know if they're actually forgiving themselves or pretending. And I do forgive people very easilly.
One of my personal sins is not trying something when you have the chance to. You will always have that regret with you and I hate that feeling.
Another one of my personal sins not being who you are. I always try not to "mask" who I am when I am with different groups of people. I stay the same person, and that person is who I want to be. You shouldn't mold yourself to fit in. Be yourself.
what everyone is saying about forgiveness is so right, people need to give a seconded chance and forgive and forget. people have a hard time to forgive but it dose take awhile to forget for something that person has done. it also helps if you can be nice to aothers becuase itit showsa that you are a nice person and you care about them. everyone just forgive and forget it always works(somtimes)
-Raquel
I believe that sinning is a part of life and noone is near or close to perfect we all strive to be someone and i assume that most of us set goals in which we want to achieve which is a wonderful outlook on life. ( at least i think so) but just as sin is a part of life so is forgiveness and no matter how hard we may try to not commit personal sin it is going to happen anyway so therefor it is simply a part of life and while sinning occurs forgiveness must follow because we are only human and we cannot be perfect.
i really like how everyone is talking about forgiveness. forgive and forget is definately the way to go. there is no point in staying mad. everyone deserves a second chance but it shouldnt be given to them too easily because they need to be honestly sorry before they can be forgiven.
The comment above said it perfectly. Sure you can forgive a person, but why forgive them if they don't care as well and are not truly regretful.
a lot of people assume i trust to easy because i'm so quick to forgive. yes i forgive fast, before they even ask for it, but that doesnt mean i trust them. i actually don't trust anyone. so i think you can still forgive if you don't trust but some may disagree.
I think that alot people personal sins have to do with there past. i think the way people are rasid or treated when young effeects the way they act when they are older.
i agree with obert because much of who you are depends on ypur past and what has influenced you to be the person you are today. whether or not you forgive quickly and forget all depends on what experiences you have had...
SINS are very bad because you being a sinner and if you sin then you have to do some really good things also if the pearson that you sin upon forgives you then its better but it was not ok that you did the sin in the first place
sins are bad and can hurt people both mentally and physically they can lead to freindship problems and even problems in your family forgiveness can reverse the sin and normally make everything the way it used to be. I personally was mean to a freind one day and didnt even know it butit ended up hurting the persons feelings later i thought about my sin and felt bad so i said i was sorry and he forgave me and everything is back to normal.
i also have a personal sin of i always try to smile at everyone i get eye contact weather i know them or not
i agree with obert and maureen. the way that you were brought up definately depends on the way that you act, or the sins you commit. althought you do have the choice to act the same way, retaliate or go the opposite direction of what you were brought up with. in the end, it is your own personal choice.
just being able to forgive someone is hard that why you need to be able to trust them becuase it is hard. just recent i was talking with a friend i thought i would be able to trust that person.that ended not so well becuase the person just wanted to use me, for things. now we dont talk anymore and it will take me a long time to forgive someone that was just using my friendship.
raquel
A personal sin of mine is not stopping something when I know it's wrong. Like if someone is talking bad about someone and I know it's not right, then I feel oblagated to say something. If I don't, I feel horrible and thats it's my falt that those people feel that way, or think that way about that person that they were talking about. As for repentance and forgivness, they are both hard. It's easy to make mistakes. But with it being hard to ask and gain someones forgivness makes it worth what you go throught to get it. In a way you try to get back the respect you lost, or you show and prove your committment or dedication to a person. But when you get caught and try to get it, it gets tricky. Thats when people do it because they wanna get someone off their backs. I agree with Lesley that people do deserve a second chance. But they mess up that one....really depends. I'm a very forgiving person. And once I forgive them again that doesn't mean I have to hang out with them. And that doesn't mean I didn't truly forgive them. I knew someone who I gladly just gave chances to like it was Christmas, but got to know how that person acted and just didn't want to be around them anymore. Sometimes moving one starts with good-bye. I forgave them again happily, and I truly wish the best for an old friend. I hold nothing against them.
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